Meat Truck

It is well documented that several species of meat are carnivorous. Burgers, however (especially those of phylum fastfoodium), are known for sport hunting. 1 of every 3 burgers is born into a highly populated area and hunting in urban environments is strictly prohibited. Many city burgers eventually succumb to the relentless temptation. Ironically, burger-related crime rates are particularly high in meat-friendly cities such as Chicago and Philadelphia. A crime against meat is a crime indeed.

Special shout out to Senor Tibblesworth Van Vilderbottom (a.k.a. Dorkchop) for his long time support of the Truck.

So fluffy. So nutty. So tasty?

Thanks Natalie Dee!

Finally a Coke flavor you’re supposed to drink for breakfast

MILWAUKEE – A Milwaukee man was accused of shooting his lawn mower because it wouldn’t start. Keith Walendowski, 56, was charged with felony possession of a short-barreled shotgun or rifle and misdemeanor disorderly conduct while armed.

According to the criminal complaint, Walendowski said he was angry because his Lawn Boy wouldn’t start Wednesday morning. He told police quote, “I can do that, it’s my lawn mower and my yard so I can shoot it if I want.”

A woman who lives at Walendowski’s house reported the incident. She said he was intoxicated.

Walendowski could face up to an $11,000 fine and six years and three months in prison if convicted.

A call to Walendowski’s home went unanswered Friday morning.

Don’t look now, but your feet are untied!

Click the picture for more Anvari photos

For people who prefer their music well done…

Click on the photo above for pictures of additional sculptures in the creepy meat exhibit

ST. PAUL (AP) – Wondering what’s on the menu at this year’s Minnesota State Fair?

Food officials are introducing Pig Lickers, Pickle Pops and Big Fat Bacon.

There was some hesitation about allowing something called Pig Lickers to be sold at the fair. But Charlie Torgerson, who co-owns several Famous Dave’s Franchises, says the chocolate-covered bacon decorated with some sea salt is the best meat out there.

If you want the bacon but not the chocolate, you might try the Big Fat Bacon. It’s one-third pound of bacon, fried and caramelized with maple syrup. It’s served on a stick.

And a Pickle Pop? It’s simply pickle juice frozen in a push-up sleeve. Fair vendor Preferred Pickle came up with the idea after years of serving deep-fried pickles on a stick.

The Minnesota State Fair runs August 21 to September 1.
—
Information from: St. Paul Pioneer Press

marriedtothesea.com

Chicago Tribune – 6/15/08:
To find a bar with good beer and burgers is a blessing.

But throw in Bacon Night––yes, gentle reader, all the bacon you can eat, and it’s free—and you’re in pig heaven.

All that’s missing is fried pickles and unlimited Guitar Hero. Wait, that too?

Yes, Whiskey Road, 1935 N. Damen Ave., is the place to be from 6 to 10 on Monday nights, when bacon is king.

Owner Matt Miller has a simple philosophy: “Bacon is like the Internet. It should be for everyone.”

Whiskey Road opened about eight months ago and started doing bacon in January.

All visitors have to do is go to the kitchen window in the back room and say the magic words—”bacon, please”—and a basket containing a quarter-pound of golden brown goodness will arrive in minutes.

Whiskey Road has a lot going for it: atmosphere, a nice selection of beer, excellent burgers, chalkboard walls waiting to be written on, the aforementioned Guitar Hero, movies (“Spinal Tap” the night we were there). And bacon. Up to 40 pounds a night.

This is the stuff of legend.

Miller—a vegetarian, by the way—tells of two customers who went at it one evening in a greasy mano-a-mano competition.

“Both of them said something like after the fourth basket it stops being love and becomes a chore.”

One guy totaled six baskets—a pound and a half to us mere mortals—and wound up his night gulping water and drawing sketches on the wall of pigs eating people.

“We had a guy here, a tattoo artist,” Miller recounts. “Not in the best physical shape. He had, I think, six baskets. The next day I saw him and he said, ‘I’ve ingested all kinds of drugs, I’ve imbibed all kinds of alcohol. But I’ve never had a bacon hangover.’ “

Individual meatcakes for Truckers with enough time to add food coloring to mashed potatoes and sqeeze out of a decorative frosting tube, but not enough time to sit and eat.

This round of meaty cupcakes is dedicated to Sarah Pie, helpful friend of the Truck.